Monday, January 04, 2010

Signs, questions, and other random stupidity.

I have had an amazing last few days, my only regret? Not taking my camera with me everywhere I went!! Seriously, it was just unbelievable!

Questions
New Years Eve (approx. 4 minutes after midnight) Chris and I are leaving our local casino, where we went for a glass of free champagne and to ring in the new year. We get to the doors, where the valet guy is standing with a woman who is (I assume) waiting for her car to be pulled around. We are all standing in this little "valet" room, and she looks over at us, and says "Did you have a good new year?"

blink. blink.

I'm thinking, what?!?! the new year is like 3 minutes old so far, how could anyone have had a good new year yet? So I smile (instead of busting out laughing) and say "Yeah it's been great so far, thanks."  Now, don't get me wrong, I know she probably meant "new years eve" or "new years party" or some such, but seriously....people, I have one rule. Think before you speak. It really isn't that hard to do, and it will save you from looking like a total idiot as soon as you open your mouth.



Signs
I really REALLY should have gotten pics of these, but I didn't so I will do my best to describe them for you.

Chris and I went to our local CVS (pharmacy). As we were leaving, on our left by the door is the little cut-out gambling room. There is a line of slot machines, a bar stool in front of each. On this particular occasion, there was a person (of unknown gender) sitting in the middle bar stool, playing a slot machine. This person was obviously either homeless or traveling or something, as they must have been wearing 4 or 5 shirts/sweaters/jackets. I could see (from behind, mind you) several different colors of shirt tails and corners or zipper pulls hanging down, all filthy. I counted two pairs of pants and noticed mismatched socks and falling apart shoes. Two clashing knitted winter hats. All of this, to me, says 'probably not a model, doctor or senator.' I look up, at the entryway to this room and notice the sign (big, colorful, permanent sign).

"Beauty"

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Driving home on New Years Eve, Chris and I passed our local Walgreens (guess it's just a pharmacy thing). On their outdoor sign it said..

Happy New Yaers (with the 'E' tipped at an angle)

underneath that I saw

HINI Available.

Oh my word, I just came apart laughing, let me tell you!! My first thought was "hini" as in booty, as in "he pinched my hienie" Oh, now that's something to offer on New Years Eve!! Then Chris says "No babe, I think they mean the H1N1."
I stopped laughing, took a breath, thought about it for half a second and began laughing so hard, that I almost made a mess in the front seat. "Oh so now they are offering the Swine Flu?!?! Bwuahahahahahaa!!"

Yeah, so as you can see - we had an interesting night.

Hope you all had a great New Years Eve! Oh I'm sorry, make that New Yaer's Eve! :)

~M

3 comments:

  1. I, too, almost peed my pants when I saw the H1N1 sign at Walgreens. Didn't know what it was!!! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  2. Giggle, fun post, thanks for keeping your eyes open and sharing this oddities with us. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. That's funny! We spent New Years Eve at home in bed... so it was great!

    ReplyDelete

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