Good News and Better News

The good news is... Mr. Man and I started a new class at church last night called "Church History". I've been looking forward to this class for months now, ever since they first started talking about offering it. So, we grabbed our bibles and headed to class, after dropping Da Boy off at the church child care room. Besides the teacher, our class totaled 11 people. We were given the book "The Church in History" by B.K. Kuiper and with that and a Power Point, we got to work. This class is exactly what I've been praying for; an in-depth study of the Christian church, from Jesus to modern time, including a study in the denominations.

I'm so happy that we signed up for this class, it's going to be difficult; we are already in a growth group, plus regular church and our own daily devotionals, also Mr. Man is in a men's group studying the Book of Mark. I spent 2 hours last night, transcribing my notes and the power point to a notebook, and that was just for the first class! But, I think it'll be good for us, and I'm happy to see that Mr. Man is also excited about it.


The better news is.... the test results are in and I don't have to have surgery on my back! Can I get a woot woot?!  If you have no idea what I'm talking about, go read the post in which I explain whats wrong. I was pretty worried to have this test done, alone, but it turned out that it was no big deal and I'm just a wussy. Go me. I took Da Boy over to a friend's house for a bit, and he had a blast. The doctor that did the test was wonderful, very kind and gentle. Yes, he gave me the "if you don't quit smoking you are going to die" lecture, but I don't mind that, especially since Mr. Man and I are trying to quit. This test was really uber important because basically it would tell us if there was any nerve damage in my back or legs, and if so,  I would need surgery. But... there's not any! Just irritation, which I can alleviate with physical therapy, anti-inflammatory meds and quitting smoking. I really believe that God heard all of our prayers, and also the prayers of our friends. Some might call it luck, or even Fate... but I know the truth. I have been so blessed in this life, and I know that God wouldn't let me down this time.

The good, the bad, and the walker

This last week has just been crazy. My epidural for my back has failed, and there are some days where I cannot walk unsupported. I've borrowed a walker from a friend and have been using that when the pain gets out of control. I went to see Dr. Jones on Thursday and after talking with him (He couldn't believe I have this disease and am only 30 years old) he set up an EMG test for me. The problem with that, is that it's on Tuesday and I have no one to watch Da Boy. This test includes a bunch of needles and some pain, so I can't have him sitting there watching.

The good in all this is that Da Boy is back with us, and it's been Ah-maaaazing! I don't know where my hope would be with Mr. Man and Da Boy. They take such good care of me when I'm hurting, and have both been pouring on the love for Mama. I am indeed the world's luckiest woman in this area.

I have good days, they aren't all pain-filled and miserable. Sometimes, I don't take any pain meds at all. Other days, I only survive because of them. I cannot know what the future holds for me, but I DO know that I am not alone. I have you, my faithful readers (wink wink, nudge nudge), my loving family, my good friends, my coffee, and my God.

Bringing Miranda's Back... well, back!

(back-dated from 5/12/2010)

If you take a look at my last post, Hiatus - I was in a pretty bad place. Hurting, cranky, and worried, I was not really in what you'd call a 'good place'.  Today, however, I'm a bit better. Yesterday I went to the doctor and had my first, and hopefully only epidural shot for my back. I woke up this morning almost completely pain FREE! Only some soreness, but what a blessing not to wince with every step! God is good ALL the time!

The visit to the doctor's was not very note-worthy, but I'm proud to say that I went in alone (they wouldn't let Da Boy in, so he and Mr. Man hung out in the waiting room) I didn't scream or pass out, and I wasn't ashamed that I cried a little. It hurt. No, not as much as I thought it was going to, but yeah - it hurt. 


See I wasn't even going to get the epidural. I was terrified of the procedure, scared to death that it would be painful, and worried that it would somehow make me worse. With that said - I owe huge and sincere thanks to a couple of people. 

THANK YOU Mr. Man for telling me "it's your choice whether or not to do it, but I think you should" and praying with me about it. I love you.

THANK YOU DeeJay for telling me about your experiences with this disease and the epidurals. Also for telling me to get the epidural .. I think if you'd said not to, I wouldn't have.

THANK YOU Princess, Loue, Sissy T, Alice, Mark, Debbie & Bill, Brian & Jo, Sunny, Caitlin, Steph and everyone else who prayed for me, talked with me about it, and supported me through this. I cannot explain how much it means to me that I am called 'friend' by so many. I can only pray that I am as good a friend to all of you as you are to me. 

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Philippians 4:6

I have spent the last several days doing just that. Or rather, trying to do just that. I've been anxious, and scared, and unable to make simple decisions for the last week. So, once I figured out that I was being attacked by the Enemy, I've been battling those feelings, and turning to my Life Manual for help. I found it in two places. The scripture above has been a mantra for me throughout these last few months, but I've also been directed (by friends, the Christian radio station I listen to, and Pastor Bill's sermons) to Jeremiah for inspiration, comfort and support from my Father. 

Jeremiah 29:11-15

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."

Jeremiah 31:3-4

 The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying:
       "I have loved you with an everlasting love;
       I have drawn you with loving-kindness.

  I will build you up again
       and you will be rebuilt, O Virgin Israel.
       Again you will take up your tambourines
       and go out to dance with the joyful."

I am scheduled to have my first epidural shot today. This is supposed to help relieve the pain so that I am able to do physical therapy and strengthen my core and back so that the next time it starts hurting it may not be as bad. I've been really stressing about this procedure,  but I know that God wants me to do it, and that it will help. I also know that many people are praying for me. I wish there was a way I could say "Thank You" enough for everything that my friends have done for me... but I don't know how. The only way I can, is to do my best to get better.

Hiatus

Hello friends. I'm so sorry that I haven't been posting lately. I haven't been able to. So... here's the short version, since I don't really have the energy or sitting ability to give you the longer one right now. On 3/28/2010 my back went "out". Now, I've had back troubles for years, but this was different. After hours crying and screaming and horribleness, Mr. Man finally convinced me to go to the hospital. They gave me pain meds and whatnot and several hours later we headed home, after a trip to Walgreens for oxycodone and a cane. Yes, a cane.

That was  a week and a half ago. Since then, I've been in a lot of pain, ranging from really bad to tolerable, depending on how long ago I took my meds or whether I was sitting, standing or trying to pee. Last Friday I had an MRI done on my back. The results are in. I have something called Lumbar  Degenerative Disc Disease and Lumbar Stenosis. I'll just call it LDDD since it was a bitch to type out. From what I've been able to find out online about this disease, it's basically arthritis of the back, but normally is only present in the elderly. I'm 30. So, I have an appt. with a back specialist on Friday to go over my MRI results and find out what we can do about this, to get me back on my feet (yes, I'm still on the cane).

I'm fine. Really... I am. It's just hard to walk, or sit/lay/stand for any length of time without changing position. I'm sorry I haven't posted. Joshua comes home today, and I'm a bit worried about it, since I can't do 3/4 of the things I normally can, but it IS getting better. I'm hoping to be done with the cane in the next couple days. I cannot thank my loving church family enough for all of the support and kindness we've received since this started. Meals have been provided, rides to the doctors, phone calls, facebook messages and prayers.... I love you all, even if you don't read this, I thank you from the bottom of my heart and am still hoping to find a way to repay these kindnesses. Sitting here at the computer for the time it has taken me to type this up is starting to wear on me, so I'm going to wrap this up. I just wanted to let you all know that I'm here, I'm ok, and I love and miss you all. I'm hoping to be able to start my daily blogging again regularly, and I'm going to start trying with tomorrow's post.  God bless you all, my friends, and I'll keep you posted!

~Miranda